my baby

I can't believe it's been a year. It seems like just yesterday. I still miss him so much every single day! I lost my dear Carm to cancer exactly 1 year ago today. I don't think this pain of losing him will ever leave! I am glad that he isn't suffering anymore and I take comfort in knowing I will see him again some day, but there are no words to express how much I miss him!

Please click here to see some very adorable pictures of my little carm cakes!

Preston & Sadie visiting their big brother today...

My Carmen...


i love Him.

I had to go to someones house today.. I left my house thinking I had their key with me but once I got there I realized that I didn't. So, I got in my car and headed home confidently thinking I knew where I had the key. I got home and looked 3 times in the place the key should have been. It wasn't there.

Whenever I realize I lost something, I always go into a panic mode and start searching like crazy instead of just asking the Lord to help me find it. The reason I say this is because whenever I lose anything and I ask Jesus to help me find it, I ALWAYS find it but for some reason my first instinct is just to look, I forget to ask!

So, after looking where I thought it should have been and realizing I had no idea where this key is, I remembered.... " just pray!"

So I said this: "Dear Jesus, please help me find this key........ instantly. In Jesus name I pray. Amen."

As I was praying, I was about to stop the prayer after I said "key" but then I realized I need to find this key now, not in a couple hours so I added the word instantly real fast and BEFORE I even ended the prayer, I got this vision in my mind of exactly where the key was. I finished the prayer and ran to that spot and there it was... exactly where I saw it in my head. He told me "instantly" before I even could finish my prayer. I love when He does this!!!

I have another similar story here!


Bebo has always been my favorite!

for me...

Sometimes when I'm all alone
I don't know if I can
Take another breath
Some say home is where the heart is
Tell me where my home is
'Cause i'm scared to death

Falling from the rooftop
Crashing like a raindrop
Can you make my heart stop
Shaking like a leaf
Standing at the floodgate
Steady as an earthquake
Can you hear my heart break
Tearing at the seams

I am drifting in the deep end
Holding on to your hand
Is all that saves me now
Life can treat you like a beggar
You hold me together
But I don't know how
Some say home is where the heart is
And my heart is in your hands
You are all I need

Rising from the ashes
Lifting from the madness
Now you see my heart is
Deep enough to dream
Heal me from the deathblow
Lead and I will follow
Now you feel my heart glow
Mending at the seams


It's finally feeling like Autumn here in southern Caifornia and I love it!


thank you.

To everyone who took the time to comment and help me in the post below. Thank you with all of my heart! I haven't forgot about you and plan on getting back with each and everyone of you! I am currently dealing with some issues that are even worse than that one at the moment, so that one is on hold. Thank you again for your loving words and helpful hearts! xo.
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